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However, imagine what could happen if every synagogue abandoned the heteronormativity and misogyny consistently bleaching Jewish women out.Jewish Gay Dating is a free and confidential dating site for gay Jewish men. Now, I don’t think you should abandon your synagogue and dye your tallit rainbow if that’s not your thing. Our sanctuary is an actual sanctuary for them. The temple is sprinkled with interracial couples, Jews of choice, and other marginalized members of our community who might not identify as queer, but definitely feel like an outsider in more traditional spaces.
That’s why we aren’t the only hetero couple at the gay synagogue. My newfound bliss comes with the understanding why so many services at other synagogues didn’t feel spiritual at all. When my boyfriend bought me a kippah there, it was the first time I felt fully embraced as a member of the Jewish community. It was at my LGBTQ synagogue that I first felt that partaking in every Jewish tradition was an option for a woman. And we know that excluding women from public life isn’t going to make anyone less obsessed with sex in fact, shoving all the nice Jewish girls into a crowded corner might have the opposite effect.Īt my temple, we’re more obsessed with Talmud than tatas, anyway. Marching to our own beat in a synagogue of LGBTQ people, we know that any gender can be attracted to any gender. (If playing the drums is such a turn on, why can’t I name the percussionist in Coldplay?) Recently, an Orthodox bride was chastised for attention-seeking behavior because she played the drums at her own wedding. In some Jewish communities, prohibiting women being seen (and therefore desired) has led to newspapers refusing to publish their faces or blurring them out as if they are a dirty word. Meanwhile, Jewish men enjoy nearly 160 feet of space. For example, the women’s prayer side of the Western Wall in Israel is overcrowded and less than 49 feet long. However, for Jewish women, separate has never been equal. Women and men are segregated in more traditional religious spaces based on the idea that their attraction to each other distracts from their practice. It rejects that fact that Judaism needs to hold up the patriarchy it was founded in. Women are never restricted to the worst seats in the synagogue or prohibitive gender roles.
During services, God is referred to with both male and female pronouns.
My partner doesn’t go to “the gay shul” because he’s queer. At my synagogue, it’s as if heteronormativity has been slurped out of its organ system by a vampire-themed drag queen. There, we don’t erase that Debbie Freidman was a lesbian, the bathrooms are gender neutral, and our Purim party is drag extravaganza.
As a bisexual woman, it’s a place where I can feel fully welcomed to pray. What are we, a man and woman madly in love, doing at the temple that specifically caters to LGBTQ people?Įnjoying going to shul more than we have before.įor me, going to Kol Ami was an obvious choice.